I just had waaaaaay too much fun decorating the atrium at work for holloween theamed kids night. I climbed up on latters and strung fake spider webs in it so it looked like a tunnel. and then I hung fake bones wrapped in "bloody" gauze from spider webs and it looked like a dead body died in it. it was pretty awesome.  though i kind of wished i had ha da severed head...
i wanted to do more with these wicked chains they had, but my co-workers made me give them the staple gun back and said I was getting obsessed......

but if anyone stops by on friday overnight or saturday overnight, they should deffrinately take a look! its awesome.
and I work doubles on both friday and saturday, so friends are greatly appreciated!
anyways, I am going to knitt and watch a movie.

by the vacuum at work last night.
I was taking down the big vacuum hose and the end metal piece whacked me in the mouth. and split my lip. it bled and everything.
it's healing pretty fast. but I just feel stupid.

I love mornings.
I never really get to wake up early since I work overnights so much, but I woke up early this morning.
I woke up from a dream at like three thirty and just had to draw. i had such a huge urge to draw that immeadiately had to find a sketch book and a pen and draw something out. and its an interesting something. i'll have to work on it a bit, but it is promising.
I am not always the best artist ever. but I love it. 
but this morning is so beautiful. I got to see the sunrise, which was lovely.
I never get to see sunrises any more and if I do it is when I am getting home from work and I usually am too tired to appreciate them.
but this morning it was lovely.
There is something about mornings that just make me want to create and dance and enjoy life.
maybe it is because it is so clean and fresh outside.
I think I am going to finish this pot of coffee and then fold some laundry.
I might even look online at some more schools.
I think today is going to be a lovely day.

apparently I have a stalker
a real one and its kind of scary.
he has stopped by a few times the last couple of days asking about me
like when i work, what my name is, what color is like, weird stuff like that.
I cant go outside by myself at work anymore.
even during the day.
so that sucks. and they might not let me do overnights during the week by myself
if he comes back again.
at least I have pepper spray.

and last night at kids night
a little girl
a horrible little monster of a little girl
asked me "are you a girl? cause you look like a boy."

so I have a stalker
and I look like a boy
woohoo
my life is exciting

events of yesterday:
I played baseball with like 10 cute boys. it was fun. and I actually played pretty well. but if I play with them again I want to bring more girls.

there was a cute little old lady that talked to to me during my overnight shift for like 45 minutes. she was really sweet.

doing a crossword puzzle with three different tables at the same time. it was like a resturaunt event!!

some one told me that elvis was the messiah....


oh the people you meet on an overnight shift. I like them.

work was long
but I made money
and the baker gave me a fresh steaming blue berry muffin
with the crusty sugar on top
and now I am home in my jammies
eating it
with a glass of milk
 and you know what?
life isnt so bad

well I am single again.
but you know what?
its okay. actually I am enjoying it.
I don't want to deal with all the emotional responsibility of having a boyfriend.
and I need some Isabel time.
I need to figure out a room mate situation and the school situation.
and I need to spend time with my fabulous friends.
and I want to do something different with my hair...
red maybe?

my parents are dancing around the house singing songs from musicals.
they are cute.
I hope I am cute like that when I am old and married.

A lot of stuff is hitting the fan right now and peoples lives are going haywire. people are breaking up, quitting school, loosing friends, and making general asses of them selves and don't really know what to do about it.
well I think its that time of year and its happening to everyone. and it sucks. but just know that I love you all. and I am here for you guys. so I am sending a big ol' hug out to everyone. because you all need one. and I do too.



*hhhuuuuggggg*
love Isabel

Thank you to everyone that has been supportive of me these past weeks, I love you all!!!!

so I have decided to make some decisions about things. like I am going to go back to school in the fall. I am not sure where or for what, bt I am going to do it.
and I am going to move out of my parents house in the next six months. It will be so much easier on everyone involved for me to move out I think. And I have the means to live on my own and my very own car. I just need a roomie, but I think I found a couple from work so I think that might be covered.
and I have been working out more. and I enjoy it a lot. and I think I am going to be a vegetarian. I haven't eaten meat in like a week so I am on my way. I just need to find a good compleat multi vitamin.

I need some coffee.

so rob and I broke up after two years. its official. as of last night.
the hardest part? I keep do things throughout my day and think"oh I wanna tell rob that!"
and then I realize I cant.
and I feel like I am going to fall apart again.
I never realized this would be so hard.

well I am officially 20 now
and I have a ukulele
its yellow orange
im going to learn to play it and be like mailynn monroe in some like it hot
twill be awesome
and rob threw me a suprise birthday party
I had no idea
it was really amazing
and I love everyone
^-^
im gonna go and look up chords online now
I can already play like 2 songs
im awesome sometimes
I got some neat looking books from kate I am gonna go read later
yay for the possibility of a movie with heather tonight!!!!!

news flashes to me.

1) I can be a jerky dimble-brain  sometimes, but Ill get my coconuts in order, I promise.
2) I really need to find a room mate that needs to move out in about 3 months or so
3) I wanna fly a kite
4) my birthday is in like a week and a half and im not going to be a teen ager any more. I feel old...
5) i think I need to pick out a career and get my butt back into school so I dont have to be a waitress for the rest of my life.
6) I want to own my own diner maybe some day and call it "Bell's Cafe" and have natural and organic and healthy food. like a healthy perkins. it could be cool.
7) i have to take better care of my feet
8) I like the YMCA. my family got a membership there and I really enjoy working out . its fabulous.
9)I miss you all.

so aparently my mom doesnt enjoy talking to me or my company..
and how I know this? she told me.
she said she just doesnt really care that much about what I think
and you know what? fine.  she doesnt respect me.
she isnt treating me like an adult.
 or even as nice as she treats the kids in her classes
I know she is stressed
but that doesnt mean she canb treat me like crap
and treat me like an emotional punching bag.

she makes comments all the time about me being "blue collar"
since im not in college im worthless aparently.
im not accomplishing anything with my life,
even though I work like a horse and I have more money in my bank account then she does.
 I know I have to go back to college eventually
but its my decision im thinking maybe in the spring ill go back
I think ill be able to handle it financially and personally.

dont get me wrong I still love my mom,
but I think I am past the point where we can live together any more.

so today? I started packing thinks in boxes. just things like winter clothes, and winter bedding and stuff like that
and so since im planning to move out this summer ill be ready for it.
and it might be a bit of a slap in the face to my mum to see me packing boxes.
god ima bit of a vindictive bitch at times...

but on a much lighter note, im getting my first paid art gig!!
im painting some mirrors in the dinning room at perkins. and they are only paying my normal wages and everything
but its still paid. and it still makes me really happy.

and I also have a shiney new cobalt blue ds light. its quite cool.

things that I like
-colored glass bottles
-spring flowers peeking up out of the snow
-long lazy mornings with nothing to do
-dried fruit in granola
-pretty flower pots
-esspresso
-the albone squirrel that lives out side in my yard
-old movie posters
-multi grain bagels with cream cheese
-doctor who
-rob's new george forman grill

things that I just dont understand
-people that refuse to eat vegetables
-screamo, listening to it makes my voice hurt
-when people listen to the same music that everyone else listens to
-people that jog while its storming outside
-why daddy just handed me a big clump of lettuce to eat...
-why my mum thinks that some how im going to ruin her and dads life, because im not going to college
-why I didnt love the piano when I first started playing it, but I just cant wait to play it now
-super america has extra caffeine coffee. what is that for..
- dresses that have no shape and kind of look like sacks...
-why do slip resistant shoes have to be so ugly?

I has employments!!!
at the perkins on county road d
as a waitress and a hostess!!
i am no longer a jobless bum!
so there
and hten im gonna take an online class or 2  this summer
see if I can handle it with work and then if I can im gonna move out
so thats the plan
and I feel better now
not having anything to do was driving me insane

I just got a huuuge amount of clothing,  from all the gift cards I got for christmas
that were from places like H&M and old navy, and I hardly spent anything
so im excited
go me and my cute clothes
^-^

Things I like:
-spicy mustard
-artichoke hearts
-ice skating
-drinking nice cold water
-making cakes
-feeling like I am taking my life into my own hands
-not totally sucking at bowling^-^
-watching movies in the middle of the night when I cant sleep
-running around in the snow
-haveing a clean car
-chinese checkers
-sunshine
-knowing spring is coming soon
-haveing a clean room
-being more organized
-libraries
-spring flowers, esspecially yellow tulips

Things I find perplexing:
-applying for jobs
-highschool children
-parents
-computers
-football
-stomachs
-lotion bottles
-furnaces
-scarves used as belts
-accordians
-plastic pink lawn flamingos

because of my slight melancholy I am in
I got a hair cut
its quite a bit shorter
but its really cute
ill have to post pictures
dont worry
its not a recall of my horrible short hair days in middle school
^-^
i already feel better
I think ill go knitt

things I love:
eating oranges
getting a score of 125 in bowling ^-^
cooking really good food
drawing in pen and pastels
spending time with boyfriend
making new friends
reading new books
driving late at night with really good music playing on the radio and singing along at hte top of my lungs
playing piano

things I dont like:
the feeling like i dont really have any good friends any more and realizing its my fault for pushing them away
not having a steady fulltime job with benefits
having a car that doesnt always like to work
not having enough money for hte stuff I want
living with my parents and not having my own space and knowing im not going to be able to move out for a whlie
the news on while im eating dinner
when my nose gets cold
the fact that i dont get much more then about 3 hours of sleep a night cause im worried about stuff


but I know things'll get better
just right now they arent verry fun
but I am drawing and painting more
I really love art
and im playing hte piano
I have an ideo for a really neat job..
but im gonna keep it to myself untill I go after it and see if I cant get it or not
I hope I do
itll be awesome